so, darkness has fastened its velvet cloak over the world, and yet here i am! 3am, bright-eyed and bushy-tailed. to an extent.
my fingers are itching with words, but my eyes are itching with sleep! to which part of my body shall i succumb? i so desperately want it to be the latter, but the former must be vented otherwise
there will be "cuffs round the head", to quote!

today was an awful day. tears were shed, marks were made! it shud be SHITday, not SUNday.

....i miss drawing. and i miss him!

excellent news; ive finally started writing (it). after months of prolonged fear that i would unable, incapable,

incompetent...it would appear that i am not! the process is incredibly tedious tho, like ensuring the equal distribution of peas on plates. except abit more so.

i am less miserable than usual, however, i suspect this is from sheer tiredness rather than an

increase in good circumstance.

tho...i did get a black, gold chain classic flap 2.55 medium chanel bag!!!!!!!

its for when i turn eighteen...(t-minus three months)

and claire and i booked our holiday on friday. tarragona here we come!

that always bring the thought to food, unfortunately (food for thought...HAH)

and i so desperately want to be tiny for the holiday!

i shall have to struggle on.

im sorry. all my eloquency has been re-routed to my history essay.

here are some shoes i would like,

panick doesn't even begin to describe it!
its like this searing hot liquid begins to bubble in my toes and then crawl its way through my veins, coursing up my body and shrouding my skin in uncomfortable warmness. i can't breathe.
my head begins to spiral and i look for an escape but i cant find direction!

thoughts are powerful things.
they can be destructive - i want to stop it! there must be something wrong. because then there must be a cure for this, affliction. but the desperately sad thing is that i know, i KNOW that i'll never be good enough!